best election night tweets
Huppke@RexHuppke
And so America's last undecided voter, Phil, wakes up, brushes Doritos dust off his T-shirt and goes out to buy Halo 4. THE END
PATRICK WALSH 8 hours ago
Voted in a high school. Thrill of democracy tainted by repeatedly being called a "gaylord."
CHRIS REGAN 9 hours ago
Today, hidden Romney son Dint is released from basement lair, led by chain to polling place with promise of fresh straw and meat.
ANDY ROSS yesterday
Quick, before I decide my vote, does anybody know who Meatloaf endorses?
rob delaney @robdelaney
Guns don’t kill people. People who say “Guns don’t kill people” kill people. With guns.
not really election tweets but awesome
rob delaney @robdelaney
Chinese babies must be like "Fuuuuuck…" when they realize they're gonna have to learn Chinese.
@robdelaney
I don't speak Italian, but Pinot Grigio means "slut fuel," right?
This is a great night , drinking sierra nevada porter on cold night and watching fox news. Fox news is going to be a blast tonight.